


The Most Beautiful-est

by Amymel86



Series: Tumblr Prompts [2]
Category: A Song of Ice and Fire & Related Fandoms, A Song of Ice and Fire - George R. R. Martin, Game of Thrones (TV)
Genre: 5 Word tumblr prompt fill, Babysitting, F/M, Uncle Jon, awkward!jon, kindergarten teacher Sansa, pretty much a fic in which I explore just how much i could embarrass Jon in front of Sansa
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-08-27
Updated: 2017-08-27
Packaged: 2018-12-20 08:15:21
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,214
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11916834
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Amymel86/pseuds/Amymel86
Summary: 5 word prompt fill - 'coffee' 'kindergarten' 'puppy' 'stegosaurus' and 'stripes'@letjonsnownap sent me the above random words for me to work into a one shot :-)





	The Most Beautiful-est

**Author's Note:**

  * For [ASongofIceandHope](https://archiveofourown.org/users/ASongofIceandHope/gifts).



 

“Come on kiddos! We’re gonna be late if we don’t go now!” Jon hollered from his place at the front door of his flat, scruffy jogging pants, a shirt with a  **coffee**  stain on it and a piece of half eaten toast hanging out of his mouth.

“Uncle Jon, I am  _not_  a ‘kiddo’, I’m almost  _10 years old!”_ Rosie grumbled as she made it to his side, folding her arms across her chest. Jon couldn’t help but grin and ruffle her hair, messing up the terrible braid that he had attempted for her.

“Right you are, kiddo” he teased. Rosie scowled, pulling a smirk from him as he nodded back at her. “Double digits soon huh?” Jon gave an appreciative whistle “all grown up then.” This seemed to placate her well enough, so she turned to the mirror in the hall to undo Jon’s hard work on her hair and make a better job of it.

“Come on Sammy!” Jon called.

Sammy (3yrs old) and Rosie ( _almost_  10yrs old) were great kids. Jon was looking after them for a week whilst their parents, Sam and Gilly were taking a well earned break in the form of a week away at a luxury spa in The Reach. Luckily for them, Jon’s career as a writer meant that more often than not, he was able to dictate his working hours - and the majority of those were spent in his Wintertown flat anyway.

Today however, was Jon’s very first experience with ‘the morning school run’. So far he had cursed under his breath a total of five times. Firstly, when his alarm went off at an ungodly hour. Secondly, when he’d fallen back asleep, only to be woken up rather abruptly by little Sammy bursting into his bedroom and dive-bombing heavily onto his chest. The third curse was forced from his lips when he had sleepily made his way to the bathroom and trod on a toy  **stegosaurus**  that was casually strewn across the hall floor, along with a few lego bricks and a bit of ‘Hot Wheels’ racing track. The fourth time had been when Rosie pointed out that he had not unpacked and hung up her school uniform the previous night, meaning that her shirt had more creases than an elephant’s arse. And finally, when Sammy refused to eat the only cereal he had to offer, forcing him to cave and feed him a chocolate bar for breakfast instead.

“Can I take Ghostie to show Miss Sansa, Uncle Jon?” came the voice from the living room.

“Maybe tomorrow buddy. But if we don’t leave right now, then we’ll be late for  **kindergarten**  and I don’t want this ‘Miss Sansa’ to whoop my asssss-teroid...asteroid” Jon winced, hoping neither of the kids had noticed his slip - Gilly would kill him if her precious babies learnt any colourful language from ‘Uncle Jon’. Rosie furrowed her brows at him as she tied off her now perfectly smooth braid.

“Miss Sansa wouldn’t hurt you Uncle Jon” Sammy mumbled as he came out to the hall, dragging his little Paw Patrol backpack behind him. “She’s the kindest-ist and the most beautiful-est! She gives me Micky Mouse band-aids when I falled and banged my knee, and she makes sure I drink up all my milk.”

“Uh-huh, I’m sure she’s great Sammy, but we really need to go” Jon urged as he ushered both children out of the door and into his car.

* * *

 

_Oh Shit. She really is ‘the most beautiful-est’!_  Jon thought as he gaped at the redhead that welcomed them at ‘Lemontree Kindergarten’ with a dazzling smile and a smudge of purple finger paint on her cheek.

“Good morning Sammy!” she said, patting the little boy on the head “so you must be this ‘Uncle Jon’ I’ve heard so much about” Miss Sansa says, sticking her hand out in greeting.

“Uhh...yeah.”

“Don’t worry - all good things” Miss Sansa smirks. Jon is suddenly aware of that coffee stain on his shirt and shifts his arm awkwardly in a way that he hopes obscures it from her view.

“Uncle Jon let me have chocolate for breakfast” Sammy declared before dashing off with both arms stuck out as he ran full pelt, making a droning aeroplane noise as he went. Miss Sansa watched him go before smirking back at Jon.

“He didn’t seem too keen on raisin bran” he shrugged pitifully. Miss Sansa laughed and Jon felt the sound tingle throughout his body from his scalp to his toes.

“Uh...” he started, feeling like he’d been hit in the head with some unexpected heavy object “...we’d better be..umm...going...ahh..” Jon stuttered, not unlike he had when he was teenager faced with a pretty girl.

_Not just pretty - the most beautiful-est!_

“Ok then, well it was nice to meet you  _‘Uncle Jon_ ’“ 

Jon only manages to respond with a shaky laugh before calling out his goodbye to Sammy who was on his third aeroplane lap of the room by now. He stepped outside of the double doors but glance back through the pane of glass to see Miss Sansa start to join Sammy by chasing after him, making aeroplane noises of her own, her ‘arm-wings’ bending this way and that as she weaved about the other children.

“Your face looks weird” Rosie commented, bring Jon out of his hazy stupor. He clears his throat before they make their way back to his car so that Jon can drop her off at school.

* * *

 

The next morning Jon had gotten through a lot less curse words muttered under his breath and a lot more agonising over what he was going to wear. He also managed to iron Rosie’s shirt and coax Sammy into eating some toast.

It was all going so well - Jon had even hoped that he might not sound like a complete idiot this time. Then his phone rang on their morning journey.

“Whaddup Mother f-” came the loud voice of Theon.

“KIDS! THERE’S KIDS IN THE CAR! You’re on speakerphone!” Jon yelled, near enough having a heart attack.

 “Kids?”

“Hi Uncle Theon!” Sammy and Rosie sang in unison.

“Oh heeeey guys! Is this the week that you’re staying with Lord Grump?”

Sammy giggles from the backseat. Jon lets out a sigh.

“What did you  _actually_  want Theon?”

“To get you some action...err...”

Jon clenches his jaw as he hopes neither of the kids ask any probing questions about that particular turn of phrase. It seems his prayers have been answered as no immediate queries are forthcoming so he lets out a long breath.

“I don’t need your help, thanks.”

“Why’s that? You gettin’ some and not tellin’ me Snow?”

Jon contemplates hanging up on his friend to save any further slips for young, delicate ears.

“Getting what?” Rosie asks.

“Can I get some?” Sammy squeaks. Jon glances at him in the rear-view mirror and smiles.

“Maybe when you’re older buddy.”

“Don’t you have any better music?” Rosie gripes as she’s skipping through the tracks of his White  **Stripes**  CD. Ever thankful for the change of subject, Jon leans over and opens the glove compartment, gesturing for her to peruse his little horde of CDs that live inside, along with about a million old receipts and a parking ticket or two.

“No THEON” Jon says, returning to his phone call, trying to convey that his friend was on thin ice and needed to watch his tongue. “It’s just that I....well, I....there’s someone...I met her recently...like,  _really_  recently and-”

“Is it Miss Sansa?” Rosie asks all of a sudden, her hands still busy within the chaos of his glove compartment.

“Wha...why-why would you ask that?”

“You were looking at her funny yesterday” the little girl shrugged.

“She hot?” Theon’s question fills the car and as Jon applies the brakes to come to a slow stop in traffic, his forehead lowers to kiss the steering wheel in sheer frustration. 

He’s not quite sure what possesses him to carry on the conversation and not just hang up now and be done with it, but it has been a long time since Jon attempted to be anything but friends with someone, so he throws caution to the wind and (probably unwisely) continues along with Theon’s line of questioning.

“Yeah, she’s hot....like, really,  _really_  hot” he groans into the steering wheel, his eyes screwed shut as he remembers her milky skin, her copper hair and her sky blue eyes.

_The most beautiful-est._

“Uncle Jon” Rosie starts as she sits up straight, pulling something small and shiny with her from deep within the glove compartment. “What does  _‘ribbed for her pleasure’_  mean?”

There’s a few seconds of silence that fills the car before Jon sucks in a breath and snatches the little square foil packet from her fingers and tosses it out of the window. Theon’s hooting and cackling erupts from the speakers as Sammy calls out from the back seat.

“Uncle Jon! Littering is bad! Miss Sansa told me - we mustn’t litter!”

“Yeah  _Uncle Jon_ ” Theon teases “you won’t be able to rib  _anything_  for her pleasure if she knows you’re a litterbug!”

“Shut up Theon!” Jon yells as he honks his horn at the dithering car in front, making both kids jump in their seats.

“Ribbed for  _whose_  pleasure?” Rosie presses on as Jon actively contemplates opening the car door and jumping out.

“Miss Sansa - he hopes” Theon not-so-helpfully remarks, his voice still laden with laughter.

“But what  _is_  it?”

“I’ll...errr...I’ll tell you when you’re older Rosie...it’s...umm....it’s an adult thing.” Jon supplies as he feels his cheeks burn red. Rosie rolls her eyes, crosses her arms and lets out a huff.

“Do you know what you need Snow?” Theon asks.

“Enlighten me Greyjoy” Jon growls through gritted teeth.

“That new cologne from Highgarden - ‘Knight’ I think it’s called, and it’s a real pussy magnet, I’ve only worn-” Jon cuts off the call before any more irreversible damage could be done, like Theon casually mentioning blow jobs or porn.

Thankfully, neither of the kids throw any more questions at him and no more condoms are unearthed for the remainder of the car journey with the world’s worst ‘uncle’.

* * *

 

“Good Morning Sammy!” Miss Sansa beams as she welcomes them. “And hello Rosie and ‘Uncle Jon’“ Jon tries not to dwell on how her eyes almost twinkle as she says his name - but it’s very difficult not to when she’s looking at him like that.

“Miss Sansa?” Sammy interrupts, tugging on her pale lemon yellow shirt “you should sit down and drink some water!”

“Oh...I should? Why’s that Sammy?” she asks, crouching down to be on the same level as the young lad before shooting Jon another smile.

“Because Uncle Jon says that you’re really, really hot and when I’m hot, my Mummy makes me sit down and drink a whole glass of water.” he says matter-of-factly. Jon wants the ground to open up and swallow him as he nervously rubs at the back of his neck. 

“Well that sounds like great advice!” Sansa laughs as she stands back up and glances at Jon.

“Uncle Jon is going to get a cat magnet” the little boy blurts and Jon very nearly decides to cut his losses and leg it out of there. “But I don’t like cats that much, I think he should get a  **puppy** magnet instead. He’s already got a dog and Ghost would love some friends!”

“Ah puppy magnet huh?” Miss Sansa smirks at Jon, who tries to convey an apology using his facial features only.

“Miss Sansa” Sammy says as Jon wonders what else the kid is going to use to royally embarrass him. “Are you  _‘getting some_ ’?”

_Yep. there it is._

“Getting  _what_  sweetie?” she asks.

“I don’t know, but Uncle Jon says I can’t ‘get some’ until I’m older but I don’t think he’s ‘getting some’ either so that’s ok.”

Miss Sansa hides her smile behind her hand but it’s quite clear that laughter is threatening to escape. Little Sammy shrugs and runs off towards a a little table that has been set up with some brightly coloured playdough.

“I am so sorry” Jon breathes as he shakes his head, his cheeks hot from awkwardness.

“That’s alright” she laughs, waving away his concern. “Oh, I do need something from you though ‘Uncle Jon’“

Anything.

“As Sammy’s temporary guardian, I need you to take this permission slip away, read it, and sign it, and bring it back to me” she smiles as she shuffles a bit of paperwork, pens something on the piece of paper before folding it up three times and hands it over to Jon.

“Ok. Yes. Will do. Definitely.”

Jon backs out of the room nodding profusely and waving the folded piece of paper. As he and Rosie are walking back to the car, Jon opens it up to see what exactly it is that he will be signing.

It seems like a standard permission slip - something about a petting zoo outing - but in the corner, in red pen is some elegant scrawl.

_I think you might need to sit down and drink a glass of water too, Jon. Sansa xoxo_  - followed by a phone number. 


End file.
